I mean, everybody knows that nothing raises your blood pressure except for being fat and eating crap, so this article must be bullshit. Oh
, wait…snoring is noise, and only fat people snore! Whew! Thought you were going to tell me that I still have to die someday no matter what. I feel better now.
Also? This can’t possibly be right. Because I have it on good authority that my particular preeclampsia came from being fat and lazy. But all kinds of upside here, too, because we can just blame women for somehow getting infected with whatever.
Yeah, I’m feeling cynical tonight. So?